


let's talk about your hair

by Duck_Life



Category: New Mutants (Comics), X-Force (Comics)
Genre: F/F, Holding Hands, Long-Distance Friendship, Stargazing, X-Force #75
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-13
Updated: 2019-08-13
Packaged: 2020-08-20 11:48:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20227354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Duck_Life/pseuds/Duck_Life
Summary: Xi'an's going to college in New York and Dani's kind of loving X-Force's great American road trip. Doesn't mean they can't be something, maybe a little bit more than friends.





	let's talk about your hair

Selene may have crashed the festival, but she didn’t ruin the whole night. Dani still has plenty of time to catch up with Xi’an over a game of cornhole, bottle of kombucha in her hand where she’d much prefer a beer. “Whoo!” Xi’an cheers across from her, sinking a beanbag into the hole of the cornhole board. “That’s 2-0. Better sharpen up, Moonstar.” 

“It’s not my fault I’m used to aiming psychic arrows, not bags,” Dani huffs, leaning down to collect the differently colored beanbags. 

“No excuse!” Xi’an declares, marching across no man’s land to take the beanbags back. “Face it, Dani. There’s finally a sport I can beat you in.”

“You always beat me at chess,” Dani points out.

“ _ Tch _ . Chess isn’t a sport,” Xi’an says, standing aside so Dani can lob her own beanbags at Xi’an’s cornhole board. “Video games aren’t a sport either. Don’t let Roberto fool you.”

“Oh, I never do.” Dani tosses a beanbag and it lands about six inches to the left of the cornhole board. “Dammit.” 

“My little sister throws better than that,” Xi’an calls, laughing. Dani throws another beanbag, this one aimed directly at Xi’an herself. It hits her in the hip and she laughs. “It’s a very good thing your powers are psionic-based and aim isn’t necessary. I shudder to imagine what you’d be like with Boom-Boom’s powerset.” 

Dani flips her off affectionately. And then she says, “I like seeing you like this.” 

“What, the hair?” Xi’an asks, her hand flying to her newly-dyed pink buzzcut. 

“All of it,” Dani clarifies. “You were always so serious. It’s nice seeing you let your hair down… so to speak. And I don’t know, you look like you’re having  _ fun _ with yourself. And your, ah, ‘girlfriends.’”

“Simone and Jessikah,” Xi’an says. 

“Yeah, them.” Dani tilts her head to the side. “Are they… ?” 

“They’re, um, each other’s girlfriends,” Xi’an clarifies. “Like. Girlfriend-girlfriends. But they’re my friends. Just my friends.” 

“Okay, so, you see where calling them your girlfriends is confusing though, right?” 

Xi’an’s laughing. “I guess.”

One beanbag still hangs in Dani’s left hand, mostly forgotten for the moment. “So do you… ? Have a girlfriend?” Xi’an looks at her. “I just keep picturing you in New York with some chic penthouse loft, going to the opera with beautiful women.” 

“More like devouring instant noodles in a little studio apartment,” Xi’an corrects. “It’s nice. It’s  _ amazing _ . But it’s not glamorous.” 

“I know all about ‘not glamorous,’” Dani says. “Last night I slept in the back of the car with Siryn’s feet sticking in my face. And you’re dodging the question.” 

Xi’an sighs. “No, I don’t have a girlfriend.” 

“What a coincidence,” Dani says, tossing her beanbag across the space between them. “Neither do I.” 

* * *

The moon gets higher in the sky, and activities start winding down. Roberto and Tabs slink off somewhere to do god-knows-what. Jimmy and Terry are lying on a blanket staring up at the stars scattered across the sky. Out here in the desert, with so few lights to block them out, the stars cover the inky night sky like freckles. 

Xi’an and Dani stretch out on their own blanket, a few yards away from Jimmy and Terry, in a world of their own. “That’s Draco, the dragon,” Dani says, pointing upward, remembering long nights looking up at the sky with her grandfather. “And over there, Hercules.” 

“Oh, I loved that movie,” Xi’an says. “Danny DeVito plays Philoctetes. It was delightful.” 

“You’re delightful,” Dani mumbles, aching to hold her hand. “Did, uh, did Leong and Nga like it?” 

“Yes,” she says. “They were singing the songs for  _ weeks _ . I had to buy the CD because it was all they wanted to hear.” 

She sighs again, and Dani focuses too much on the rise and fall of her chest. “How are they liking the city?” she asks, trying to focus on the stars above her. 

“It’s loud,” Xi’an says. “Louder than Salem Center. They’re getting settled in, though. And… things have been so wild, for me and for them. I mean, after what they went through with Spiral…” It’s a hot night, but she shivers. “Things are finally stable. We’re together again, and… and everything’s  _ good _ , really good. Like I said, stable.” 

Dani looks up at the sky. She knows the constellations, but now she makes up new ones out of random configurations of stars. She sees herself and Xi’an, she sees a buzzing bee, she sees a heart. 

“I know what you mean,” Dani says. “I mean, it’s weird… me and Bobby and the gang, we’re in a different city every night. We have no money, not since Bobby’s trust fund got frozen. We have no plans. And yet… it feels  _ stable _ . It feels… I don’t know, sustainable, you know? Maybe that sounds dumb. But it’s like, we aren’t fooling ourselves thinking anyone is looking out for us but  _ us _ . We’re free to do what we want, and we’re not tied down, and we can really  _ help _ people. It’s been really good, you know? For me.” 

“Makes sense,” Xi’an says. “You always were a free spirit.”

“Hey, I’m not the one who cut off all my hair,” Dani points out, and Xi’an laughs a little breathlessly and then they’re both looking up. They’re both looking up, not at each other, but Dani can feel the small movements, the rustling of the blanket as Xi’an’s hand inches toward hers. 

Dani moves her hand a little bit and Xi’an moves her hand a little bit and then their fingers are brushing, just barely. Dani takes the plunge and intertwines their fingers, palms together, and Xi’an squeezes her hand, and still they don’t look at each other. 

“I missed you,” Dani admits, her voice suddenly lower. “A lot.” 

“Me too,” Xi’an says. 

They’re holding hands, and the world is turning beneath them. 

Xi’an tells her, “I’m going back to New York tomorrow.” 

“We’re Vegas-bound,” Dani says. 

And they’re both happy— really happy— where they are, it’s just a shame that life on the open road won’t be taking Dani to New York any time soon. It’s a shame that their own lives are keeping them from seeing each other every day, taking walks in the park, ordering takeout and sitting too-close together on the couch, watching movies, ignoring movies in favor of watching each other. It’s a damn shame. 

“I’m gonna close my eyes,” Dani tells her. “I’m gonna close my eyes, and… and you can just do whatever you want with that information.” 

And she shuts her eyes. The darkness is comfortable, blue-black nothingness where stars were a second ago. Xi’an’s hand is still warm in hers. And Dani feels Xi’an stirring, movement on the blanket, hair tickling her cheek. She feels warm lips press against her own, soft, somehow familiar even though they’ve never done this before. 

It doesn’t change anything, but somehow everything changes.


End file.
